The Rain Made Me Smile

I never liked having afternoon classes, mine being from 2:30-430. Especially when I have something due that class that I've left until the last minute, making myself spend the morning finishing it. Despite having a car and license, I choose to take the bus and train most days for my many reasons. To save on gas, eliminate my driving anxiety, have time to myself, I mean I already pay my transit pass in my tuition so why also pay for gas plus parking as well??? 

 I have to leave an hour before class to make it on time, although most days I end up leaving sometime between 12 and 1 so that I can walk around or get something to eat before class starts. I usually don't get home until 5:30. It just feels like my entire day is gone. Sometimes I do things in the morning before class; go to the gym, go on a walk, get breakfast. But hanging out with others? Impossible. As much as I like it, not many people want to hang out in the morning, plus I'm not a fan of hangouts with a time limit. No room for spontaneity. By the time I'm home, drop off my school stuff and meet up with someone it's already past 6 and I'm tired. I am 100% a morning person as opposed to a night owl. Evening or night hangouts are just not my thing unless it's a sleepover. 

This is why I always feel like my Tuesdays and Thursdays (the days I have class) are throw-away days. Wasted. I'm usually not in the best of moods on these days, especially if it's not nice enough weather...

I had a usual morning of stress due to a paper I had to hand in that day. Without going into detail, I did not get my typical morning of self-care that I've been doing lately. My mood-boosters.

I've been longing for summer or at least spring weather. There were already two days that week where it was actually super warm out. So I may have not dressed for the weather. I didn't have a proper jacket or an umbrella despite rain clearly being in the forecast. 

It rained a tad on my way to school, and a bit on my walk from school to the train, but nothing I would fret over. 

Once I got off the bus for my less than 5-minute walk home though... complete downpour. I swear it was the hardest I had seen it rain in well... maybe a month! (and that's pretty good for where I live) 

At first I was so upset. Of course It's going to rain and be cold when I so desperately want, need warmer weather. I feel like my mental health and happiness would skyrocket with even one warm day a week. 

I was walking across the road with just my thin zip-up jacket and hood on, imagining how ridiculous I must look to the drivers. They must be thinking "what an idiot dressing like its summer when it's raining," and I kind of laughed to myself. I fully knew it was going to rain today and I really did choose to ignore it. I'll admit, I kinda did look ridiculous.

After crossing the road the raindrops got even bigger and started falling even harder. Honestly, if I closed my eyes it felt like I was taking a cold shower. 

I just wanted to get home. I started to run, something I normally wouldn't dare to do alone in fear of "looking silly" but I did anyways. Something felt weird. I was smiling? I genuinely started to smile. And once I realized it, I started laughing, giggling. Water was in my eyes so much I could barely see out of them, I could feel my clothes just getting soaked and at this point my hair was drenched! But I was laughing and smiling.

I loved it.

I spun around and held my head up, just enjoying the moment. I love to romanticize and this was one of those moments. I felt like I was the main character in a movie. It reminded me of my love of dancing in the rain, something I thought I had lost.

Something I am continuously learning on this journey of mine is that you have to be able to make the most of what you are given. Of course, it would be ignorant to say you can just choose to be happy. But for the most part, we can choose how we react. 

To put it simply, it is what it is. I have no way of controlling the weather. And I fully could have let that rain just completely ruin the already stressful day I was having. But instead I chose to react with joy, with laughter, with fun. 

Have a wonderful day,

Mckenna <3